Well, I am here today to tell you that this too shall pass! Your worn down, tired, and really fretting from a lack of sleep and personal time to do anything by yourself, but it will pass. God knows that you are struggling and He knows we, as humans, are weak, but He can provide the healing that we need.
Children are a true blessing, but I am well aware that there are days that those blessings seem to be the one thing that is standing in our way to feel human again. All moms get frustrated, all moms begin to feel that they can't go on, all moms feel less than perfect, but it is okay as it will pass and you will survive. Put your faith and trust in the Creator and take a moment to breath and know that it will get better.
I am a firm believer in a form of self help for the frustrated mom, 2 minutes to breath and know that you can make it through the day. When you feel that you are at your breaking point, place the child in his/her crib and walk away. Simply shut the door and go as far away as you can within your home. Find a clock and spend the first minute just breathing, Slow and steady breaths and concentrate on it. If baby is crying, it is okay as they are in a safe spot. In the next minute, simply pray.
Now, you might be saying I don't know how to pray or I am not like that, well a prayer can simply be words said aloud to the air. God is listening whether you want Him to or not. Just say words like " this day will be over and the baby will go to sleep sooner or later, so I know I can make it through" Believe in yourself whether you believe in God or not. Know that you can make it through.
I remember days of breaking down in tears because I did not know what else to do to possibly help my crying baby, but we made it through. I remember days of wanting to walk away and never look back because of the behavior that we were struggling with, wondering how all of this could be worth anything, but it is! Many moms can't hold their crying baby or clean up that one toy that has been on the floor a hundred times, Many moms can't walk in the room and see a sleeping baby that is peaceful after hours of crying but they wish they could.
Also, many babies want to be held and there is no one there to hold them. Many babies want to snuggle in their mom's arms, and can't because for some reason mom is not there. Just this week, a friend of mine, lost a friend during child birth. That precious baby will never get to be held by mom or snuggled by mom. That mom would love to have a day that she felt she could not make it through another temper tantrum. but she will never experience that and the baby will never experience the comfort that only a mom's love can bring. How sad!
Keep that in mind as you struggle through the day and know that God is here and I am here and you can make it another day!